Your one-stop online resource for ceremonial Slovak foot-binding clamps since 1881!
Our Buyers Search The World Over For Unique Merchandise For You!
It's another Casual Friday here in one of our vast warehouses that dot the globe as two of our top buyers, June-Marie and Joyce-Ann, inspect a recent shipment of counterfeit knock-offs to see if they're good enough to carry the designer labels we'll hastily sew into the collars. Before coming to work for us, these twin sisters barely eked out a living harvesting copra, or coconut meat, on a small tropical atoll west of Long Beach. Today, they live a much richer, happier lifestyle - and earn enough to enjoy the finer things in life, such as chewing betel-nut, a mild stimulant.
Triple-Checking Your Order Means Fewer Slip-Ups!
As soon as your order is received at ScottMaiko.com Headquarters, it's sent directly to our Fulfillment Center where it is filled quickly and accurately, and then triple-checked by no less than three of our Service Associates. Here Eugene, Vera, and Andrew review a pending shipment of fake doggy-doo.
Careful Packing Is Always A Priority At ScottMaiko.com!
That's why we use only the finest packing materials - and plenty of 'em! - to make sure your item is packaged safely and securely, insuring your merchandise is well-cushioned and arrives in great shape - not rattling around with a lot of empty space around it, like text on a poorly laid-out webpage!
Wednesday Is Shipping Day- And Fried Chicken Day - Here At ScottMaiko.com!
Our shipping department goes the extra mile filling all of our many orders to be shipped on Wednesdays, and so we insist that everyone stops what they're doing the moment lunch arrives - just one of the many perks of employment at ScottMaiko.com!
After a hearty fried chicken meal with all the trimmings, our hard-working employees are right back at it, making sure everything's packed and ready to be dropped off at the post office. So if when you open your order, you find an unexpected spork, used Wet-Nap, or enormous grease stain, just consider it an extra "thank-you" for your business!
Our shipping department goes the extra mile filling all of our many orders to be shipped on Wednesdays, and so we insist that everyone stops what they're doing the moment lunch arrives - just one of the many perks of employment at ScottMaiko.com!
Quality Control Sets Us Apart From the Rest
Here's Frank Gerstner, the "chief taster" in our food division, taken just weeks ago. Frank personally makes sure all of our products are just as delicious as they can be, before they're shipped to you, the customer.
We sure you'll join us in wishing Frank a speedy recovery from his unfortunate bout with Hepatitis-C and that he'll be back in the ScottMaiko.com kitchens before too long.
In the meantime, please check our product recall page for our exciting Tainted Pickles Refund Promotion!*
*Offer good only on jars marked "Lot 273655-B" through "Lot 273672-F"
Another Satisfied Customer!
Imagine our surprise and delight upon opening a large shipment of untaxed cigarettes from Paramus, New Jersey and finding a little stowaway at the bottom of the crate! After one of our employees discovered him - and was rewarded with an extensive round of rabies injections and the (mostly) successful reattachment of her thumb we decided to put the little guy up on eBay before we all got too attached to him. The lucky auction winner, Floyd Wolanski of Smyrna, Georgia (eBay user name "PossumLuvr4U") was kind enough to send us a photo once he had arrived just seven to ten days later, thanks to inexpensive Media Mail shipping and our broad interpretation of United States Postal Service regulations.
